From Self-Doubt to Self-Leadership – Part 5: The Cost of Two Stories

I once had a direct report who always nodded in agreement when speaking with me.
She looked aligned, professional, collaborative.

But with her team, she told a different story — full of complaints and doubts.
And the team got stuck in the middle:

“Should we trust her words? Or should we trust the actions we see from our leader?”

That double message created confusion.
Confusion turned into mistrust.
And mistrust cost us performance.

That was a turning point for me.
I realized that self-doubt often shows up as two stories:
one story told upwards (to please the boss),
and another story told downwards (to release frustration).

But leadership isn’t about two stories.
Leadership is about one clear voice.
Because alignment isn’t a nice-to-have — it’s the foundation of trust and execution.

Self-leadership means having the courage to bring one consistent story to every room —
the boardroom, the hallway, and the team table.

Reflection for you:
Have you ever witnessed or experienced a similar situation?
What did you do to restore alignment and improve team performance?